beentheredonethat asked:


Specifically, my daughter’s class (multiple age, multi-grade) has a few cheerleader moms who constantly feel the need to rally (bully?) every parent in the class toward one big group gift (birthday, teacher appreciation day, end of year celebration, beginning of year kick off celebration, Christmas, 100 days in school, etc). This happens at least once every 2 months.

The teacher is lovely and wonderful and is certainly more than deserving of appreciation, but I’m not a bandwagon kind of person and prefer to show appreciation quietly and privately.

Attempts to say so in the past with, “Thanks for the opportunity to participate, but our family already had something else planned for that,” have been met with “What is YOUR problem,” looks and “Ok, whatever,” responses. Clearly I’m not winning any popularity contests. So the last few events I’ve not said anything or done anything, but just haven’t signed my name on the list of participators as the scores of e-mails have circulated.

Is there any better way to handle this that is more effective and more palatable to the planners of these events? I’m really not trying to put them off, but these gestapo methods just really are not my cup of tea.

jay asked:


Celebrity Come Dancing, The X Factor, Casualty and Match of The Day aren`t to everyones` taste. Wintertime Saturday TV has become extremely boring.
Tesco:
Thanks. Yes, they should sack all the moronic programme planners, they have absolutely no imagination; all they can think of dishing up is reality rubbish, crime & hospital stuff…
Arthur 5:
Thank you too. That just about puts it in a nutshell. They don`t think about young couples with children who can`t get out or disabled people or the elderly – but still they remind us to pay our TV licenses don`t they?

lisa asked:


Long story short– my best friend Kate has another best friend Sandi. Both Sandi and I have been best friends with Kate basically our entire lives. At least ten years or so. (We’re 20) Anyway, Kate always would divide her time equally between the two of us. The school year she hung around with Sandi more because they always went to the same school, and in the summer she hung around with me more because we work together and live closer to eachother. So this summer, she literally has been hanging out with Sandi every day and I haven’t seen her since Memorial Day weekend when we went to the beach for the whole. So anyway, we made plans to go to the beach tomorrow about a week ago. She wrote it in her planner (she writes everything in her planner) and said she had no other plans. Then yesterday she found out she had her grandma’s birthday so she told me she couldn’t come. Fine, understandable. I’m not going to make you miss your grandma’s birthday. But then she said she would rather go to
the beach and told her dad to tell her grandma she had work. So I said that’s fine too, and the plans were back on. Now, she is teling me she can’t come because she has to go to Sandi’s friend’s BBQ. So then:
Me: “You have to go to your friend’s friend’s BBQ?”
Her: “Well this has been planned for over a month
& I completely forgot! Sandi just reminded me. If I canceled I would be ditching her.”
Me: “Well, now you’re ditching me. It’s fine. You see Sandi every day and haven’t seen me in weeks but you can go to your friend’s friend’s BBQ.”
Her: “You can’t be mad, this has been planned for over a month.”
Me: “It obviously wasn’t that important to you if you forgot about it and it wasn’t even written in your planner.”

Who’s right here? Even though it was planned longer, she forgot about it. And she cancelled going out to dinner for her GRANDMA’S BIRTHDAY but she can’t cancel this?
PS. I’m not interested in answers saying “friends drift apart…” because you don’t know our friendship. I’m just interested in who you think is wrong, and why.

I guess I should also say, she also said “I would much rather go to the beach with you but I have to go, it has been planned for over a month.”

Like…. If you would rather go to the beach, then come to the beach. I’m sure your friend Sandi will be okay at her friend’s BBQ without you.
And I understand that friends drift.. but she is swearing on her dead mother’s grave that I am still her ‘best friend’ and she doesn’t mean to not hang out with me, it just happens and she can’t control it.
lou lou-

I get along with Sandi but we are in no way friends. I like her, but we just don’t know eachother very well. We never went to the the same school and we live in different towns and I’ve only met her a handful of times.

*Dreamer* ~courage & strength! asked:


so today was my first day at work im an administrative assistant.. i have no experience im 17 and im an intern…well today my boss was showing me how to use the copier to make copies and how to fax and do labels and stuff like that hmm oh and name tags… well everything was fast paced and stuff i was like woah! and my boss introduced me to a guy and i forgot to introduce myself and my boss was like “introduce yourself” … and today i “lost” a planner that my boss had given me and this lady was like wow your first day of work and you already lost your planner”… i know she was kidding but i didnt need to feel like i was irresponsible and i felt like down and irresponsible.. turns out htat another co worker had taken it by accident .. anyway the staff seems all kinda serious and bitches and my boss is like nice sometimes but more serious and like tough love like he wants things his way! and then today i forgot to throw some few strands of paper away and he was like you forgot to clean up your mess… something like that so i feel like he is gonna be on my *** a lot but then again.. when we finished doing some name tags he gave me a pop sicle and i was allowed to eat it it wasnt even my lunch break or anything i thought it was pretty cool.. however today we did labels and i kinda dont remember how to do it all but he said he would have me doing the labels tomorrow since he showed me how… does he really expect me to remember what the hell to do??? also im suppose to write down voice messages that are left on their phones (bosses is what i mean by their) but im kinda shy and kinda nervous that they are gonna deny me from checking their voice mails and stuff… help! i also have to set up their calenders and write events for them in outlook but umm he showed me today but i dont know how to do it help!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11111 please help!!!!!!!!!!!

lisa asked:


Okay, so background. My best friend Kate has another best friend Sandi. Me and Kate have been friends since we were little, but we never went to the same school. Sandi and Kate became best friends in middle school and went to the same high school. How it ALWAYS went was Kate and Sandi hung out during the school year, and me and Kate hung out every day (literally, every day) in the summer because we are members of the same beach club. And that would go on to every night as well. We haven’t been members of the beach club for 2-3 years, but we still always hung out all the time, we were basically inseparable in the summer. Except this summer, I haven’t seen her in weeks, which is fine, because friends drift apart when they go to college. But she sees Sandi every day. And then last week me and Kate made plans to go to the beach tomorrow, she wrote it in her planner and everything and said she had no other plans.
And now, a at 830 at night, she is telling me ‘I can’t go to the beach because I have to go to Sandi’s friend’s BBQ tomorrow.’ When she already canceled plans for her grandma’s birthday to come to the beach with me. So I said, “you have to go to Sandi’s friend’s pool party?” And she said, “I completely forgot, Sandi just reminded me, this has been planned for a month.” So I said, “It’s fine, you see Sandi every day and you haven’t seen me in weeks but go.” And she says “You can’t be mad, this has been planned for a month.” So I say, “It obviously wasn’t too important to you if you forgot about it and it wasn’t even in your planner.” (She writes everything in her planner.) And now I’m not calling her until she apologizes. Another thing she’s famous for, is I ask her to spend 8$ to go mini golfing with our mutual friend that we haven’t seen in about a year and she says she’s broke, meanwhile she’s texting me telling me about the cute shorts she just bought. Am I wrong to be pissed?
No.. we never went to the same school… grammar school… high school… college… and we stayed close through all of it. we’re in our third year of college and this just started happening this year.
And she doesn’t think anything’s wrong with it. In her eyes, we’re still ‘best friends’ because we text eachother all day long.
PJ-

The shorts/mini golf thing was just 1 example. This has happened more than once.

Elias asked:


i’m a straight male looking for an inexpensive tote / shoulder bag(i’m trying not get any girlie ) etc for everyday use when i go about the town and for travel.
And as far as contents go just in case if any body wondering
tissues
wallet
pocket knife
pepper Spray
gum
keys
day planner
psp/mp3
pen/ pencils
small deodorant
and sometimes a book
anything would be helpful thanks

P.S please no smart A** remarks

Chiky asked:


I heard from a wedding planner that using the monogram before the actual wedding day is kind of a “faux pas”. Now there are very many trendy invitations that include monograms which, obviously, go out months before the wedding. But I’m wondering if using a monogram on a wedding website is superstitious, bad taste, or just poor etiquette. Any fact or opinion would be appreciated!
monograms are not old-fashioned, embroidered, or out-dated. Mongrams these days are simply logos that incorporate the initials of the bride and groom. For example, the brides name is Michelle, the grooms name is Brian, and his last name is Smith so their logo/mongram would incorporate the letters M, B, & S
Not outdated… very much a traditional staple. reference: www.theknot.com

minnie asked:


in 8th grade, i had to take english and service learning. when i looked at my schedule, i wondered what service learning was. i knew i had to take it. but i was just curious on what it was. the first day of class, i had a teacher named mrs. johnson. she had blonde hair that slightly touched her shoulders and had blue eyes. She looked about 5″6 and was a very nice teacher. She always curled her hair and it looked really pretty. I loved her so much and I didn’t know why. The class was about the community and animal allies. After twelve weeks of class, mrs. johnson asked if anyone wanted to go to a meeting with her. i immediatley raised my hand. she was my favorite teacher and i didn’t want to let her down. this other girl raised her hand. we were the only ones who had our hands up. mrs. johnson was very happy and asked us if we could be there. i said i could and the other girl said she could to. the meeting was the very next day after we got informed. the next day after school, mrs. johnson spent all afternoon trying to track me down. i saw her pass my locker. i waited until she came back. i said hi and smiled. she did the same. then i walked with her and we talked. we went to the office to call my mom and approve it with her that i could go to the meeting to talk about animal allies and what we were doing in class. mrs. johnson talked to my mom over the phone. then mrs. johnson left at three because she had to be at the meeting early. i didn’t have to go until four. so i waited until 3:45. while i was waiting, i did my homework. when it was time, the principal told us that we had to leave. so me and the girl got in the principal’s van. it took us ten minutes to get there. once we got there, i got out of the car. we went into this building that was used to be a highschool. it was called the board of education. so we all walked in and went up to the second floor. i saw mrs. johnson. she smiled and said hi to us. we sat down at a table and we took our jackets off. there were about 20 adults sitting at the table. they wanted us to give speeches about our 8th grade service learning class. there were microphones on the table. we had to go there to talk about animal allies and what we have been doing in the class. the class was about the community and how we can help. mrs. johnson talked for a while. then i thought to myself ” how can i do this? i can’t talk in front of all of these people.” so i prayed to god that i would be able to do it. i was so nervous that i got a bad stomachache. i started to sweat and i got really hot. my heart sank in fear and i felt so nervous. then the other girl spoke. after the girl was done giving her speech, i went and gave my speech. i talked about what animal allies was and how we were trying to help. i talked about what we were doing in the class and what to do if you see someone being cruel to animals. after i gave my speech, i felt so proud of myself. then mrs. johnson gave another speech to wrap it up. after she was done talking, we got out of our seats. mrs. johnson told us good job and that she really appreciated it. it made me feel good that she was proud of me. then we went back downstairs to leave the building because we were all done. the girl and i got into the principals car. she was going to drive us home. mrs. johnson went into her own car. once i got home, i told my mom and my whole family about it. i called my grandma and my neighbor about it. i was so proud of myself. i went to bed having something to feel good about. the next day, i was excited to go to school because mrs. johnson would be there and that’s it. but when i got to english, she wasn’t there. i felt so bad. we had a substitute. he was really crabby and i so badly wished she was there because she actually treated me like a real person. that night, i prayed to god before i went to bed that mrs. johnson would be there the next following day. The next day when i went to class, she was actually there. I silently thanked god as i walked into the classroom with confidence. later that day, i had to go to service learning with mrs. johnson. she told the whole class that i went to the meeting with the other girl. she sounded proud of us. then some people laughed at me and i started to blush. but i didn’t care. then i missed the bus later that day. i called my grandma to come and pick me up. as i was waiting, my brother derek showed up stating that he missed the bus. i told him that my grandma was coming to pick us up. so we waited. after about ten minutes of waiting, i saw my favorite teacher mrs. johnson come in to grab some papers. i motioned to derek to look because i wanted to show him my teacher mrs. johnson. but he didn’t look. so i decided to say hi to mrs. johnson. then mrs. johnson said hi back and smiled at me. then when mrs. johnson left, i told my brother derek that it was mrs. johnson and that she was my favorite teacher. then we left the office because my grandma came. the next day, for history class we had to go down to the library to type on the computers. while i was working, i saw mrs. johnson come in with her jacket on. i thought she was going home. so i got sad. i waved and smiled at her. she smiled and waved back. my next class was english with mrs. johnson. she was actually there. i was so happy to know that. she gave us a worksheet and we had to draw a picture of our heroes. i was going to do mrs. johnson as my hero, but i thought it might sound weird if i did that. so i drew a funny picture of my neighbor. after that, i raised my hand because i was so confused and i didn’t know what to do. i told mrs. johnson i was confused. she explained it all to me. when she looked at my drawing, i laughed and she laughed too. it made me feel good that we were be coming good friends. after she explained it to me, i started working. then later that day for service learning, mrs. johnson had us play jeapordy. she put on a funny hat that had these things sticking up. i laughed because it was funny. then she sat down next to me. when she wasn’t looking, i touched her hat. my friend jessica did the same thing because i dared her too. then it was time to go and i left the classroom. the next day for service learning, i told my friend kiana that mrs. johnson and i were friends and that i went to a meeting with her. she immediatley accused me of being a lesbo and got mad. but that didn’t stop me from having a relationship with my teacher. i don’t care what people thought and i always followed my heart. i loved my class with mrs. johnson and enjoyed having her as a teacher. The next day, we watch a movie. When class was over, i got up the courage to say bye to mrs. johnson. i said bye and smiled. she did the same thing. then i left and patted myself on the back for my good work. the next day was the last day until christmas vacation. everybody was in a good mood. i was planning on giving mrs. johnson candy canes the night before. i almost didn’t go to school that day. but i did. i had three small candy canes that i was going to give her. then later that day, my best friend anne gave me a big candy cane and a lipgloss. i said thank you and i loved my gift. after that, i saw mrs. johnson in the hall and i gave her the candy. ” Merry Christmas.” i said smiling. “Thank you.” mrs. johnson said. then we walked to the classroom together as we went up the stairs. once we got into the class room we watched a movie. the next class with mrs. johnson, anne, jesscia, and me all gave mrs. johnson a card saying that she was a good teacher. i was nervous, but my friend anne and jessica convinced me to give it to her. i actually thought she was a good teacher. i didn’t want to suck up or anything. We all walked up to the teachers desk and gave her the card. It was signed by all three of us. “Thank you.” She said smiling. Then we sat back down in our seats and i was pround of myself. Then it was time to go. I actually felt good. A couple weeks after that, we had an assembly infront of the whole school to show off animal allies. I volunteered to speak infron of the whole school in a microphone with my BFF Anne. We practiced for two days before the assembly. I was really nervous. Then the day came when I had to speak. I spoke before Anne. Then Anne spoke. After the assembly, Mrs. Johnson told us good job. After that, i really started to admire her. I loved how she weared her hair. So now im thinking about getting layers in my hair so i can be like her. she is so hot. Then I talked to anne about this after the assembly. “Hey what’s wrong?” Anne asked. I looked really sad. I frowned as i looked over anne as i waved to my friend jessica. ” Yeah. I just feel like mrs. johnson hates me. that’s all.” I cried. “Oh that’s always so tough.” Anne said feeling bad for me. ” I know.” I agreed. “How long have you liked her for?” She asked. “Well we never really were friends. So techniqually were weren’t really friends. But i have seen her in school.” I said smiling. “ Umm i saw her at the mall and whoa i was way to nervous to introduce myself. So i just followed her down to the parking lot and jotted down her license plate number. which ended up being registered over to her. I just went on over to her house. Let me tell you she was so nice.” i said. Then anne smiled. “Well i mean she seemed like she prolly would be nice. i never really spoke to her. so i just waited until she went to work. i climbed through her window and i borrowed her phone book. i say borrow because im going to give it back oneday you know?” i told her. “yes.” anne said nodding. “So i called everyone in the book until i found mrs. johnson. i called her, but she wasn’t home. ooo i left her a message saying how in love with her i was. i just really wanted to have her hair. you know just basically opening up to her and stuff. But, She never called me back. So i would call and call. Then 6 months and 2 restraining orders later i decided that i deserved better than that you know. So what about you? have a girlfriend?” I asked hopefully. “No.” She said with a grossed out face. “Oh, okay.” I said smiling. Two weeks later, i was supposed to have creative writing for 5th hour with mrs. johnson. but the next day, she told us it was canceled because the school didn’t have enough money to support the class. my jaw dropped in shock. i was totally bumbed out. i had my hopes up forever. Then the next day, i asked mrs. johnson to go to the bathroom. “Can i please go to the bathroom?” i asked. “Sure. i really miss having you in 5th period.” she said frowning. “oh.” i said sounding dumb because didn’t know what to say. “so how are you?” she asked. “im alrite.” i said as i took the planner. Then i left to pee. i was so happy! she really did love me. she just didn’t show it yet. For all of the rest of the days in class i tried to be interesting by laughing and doing unique things. but it got me nowhere. how come mrs. johnson didn’t talk to me like she did to the other kids? I would ask myself. days and days went by and mrs. johnson still kept on talking to other students over me! it was so unfair. but i just decided to keep being interesting by asking to go to the bathroom more and that led to more conversations. the more i pulled it off, which meant the closer we got. the closer we get, equals best friends. after a while, she talked to me alittle more than before. i guess you just could say that we were only friends and just to leave it at that. i guess i learned to accept it.

midnight rocker asked:


What is your suggestion on celebrating a persons b-day who will be turning 60? This person don’t like parties. Actually 10 years ago when the family planned a 50th party, the honoree was angry at the party planners. Family members want to mark this milestone day, they asked my advise. Maybe if you are a I hate parties type person you could say how you would like your milestone b-day be observed. I’m looking for suggestions from you,

az asked:


I work in a semi-casual office setting with 5 other women:1 boss, 1 secretary, and 4 program planners (I am one and one is African Am.) I am a recent college grad & the youngest by 20 years but I have more education than some others.
The secretary is an older woman who is a member of the Daughters of the Confederacy. She has said some things in passing referring to “those people” about other races. Usually I would call a person on those things, but I am the new girl and she has been there a long time and really runs the office day-to-day so getting on her bad side didn’t seem worth it at the time.
Yesterday though, she flat out said to me “I don’t really like black people” and I was so shocked to hear someone say that so plainly I didn’t say anything at all.
My boss & the African American woman either ignore this or are unaware of it.
So should I say anything to anyone or ignore it?
She obviously isn’t going to change her ways this late in her life but it still bugs me.
There are only 6 employees, there is no HR Dept or complaint system.
She’s a secretary, she doesn’t control promotions or anything, just mail and messages.
I actually feel sorry for her because she had rough life and struggles with money (which is why she is still working at 70ish years old).
The rest of us get to work on projects and leave the office for off site meetings but she is stuck doing boring office work. She is sort of left out already so if I get the rest of the office to gang up on her I think it would make her feel even more like an outsider (which is why I think she is trying to pit the rest of us against each other with her gossip).
But that doesn’t give her the right to say something like that.
My boss does not spend a lot of time in the office so that is why I think she may be unaware of it. My only concern about saying something to her personally is that she will start gossiping about me next. I still feel I have to say something if it happens again.