my son who is nine thinks it’s cool to be the class clown. serious trouble at school at this point.help?
Missy H asked:
we have already met w/ his school counselor last week. he got sent home w/ a note in his day planner that our next meeting is w/ the principal. we took away his tv, phone and xbox till he starts showing different behavior. is that even effective???
we have already met w/ his school counselor last week. he got sent home w/ a note in his day planner that our next meeting is w/ the principal. we took away his tv, phone and xbox till he starts showing different behavior. is that even effective???
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This may be weird, but my brother is the same way. What is his favorite thing? It you tell him that you are going to take it away from him if he doesn’t shape up, or don’t allow him to go to a friends or something. And he has a phone?! I wouldn’t let him have that, b/c if he has a lot of friends, they could be putting him up to this. That’s just about how my mom used to punish my brother, but she lays off when he’s good. Try that, and see if it works.
Does he know why being the class clown isn’t always the best idea? Sit down with him and tell him that while making is friends laugh is fun, getting in trouble is not. Have him promise to you that he won’t be clowning around, and if he breaks the promise then tell him you are very disappointed in him and give him a harsher punishment – like raising his bedtime by an hour til he reforms or something.
although psycological approach to your son by taking away his entertainment needs is one way, sometimes you need to ask why he enjoys being the class clown, it may be simple but difficult to handle, maybe he likes attracting attention or he loves joking around and causing trouble. He may have other reasons but what i can suggest is to convinve him about how causing trouble could may affect his future. If your lucky, changes will undergo in him. Good luck =D
P.S. try to covince him the consequences of his actions (ie. possibility of suspension) will affect not only him but you and his future
Not really. You need to figure out why he is acting this way – and he may not understand it himself.
Sometimes kids with low self-esteem will clown around, as a way to hide their feelings of inferiority. Other times, gifted kids will act out due to sheer boredom. Clowning around can also be a symptom of anger or, paradoxically, of depression.
As you can see, punishment is not going to help your son deal with the problem(s) that are leading to this behavior.
All the best.
Probably not. Your son seems to be bored at school so talk to him. Is the work too easy? Is it too hard? Is he just tired of sitting too much? Can he see the board well? You need to probe him because even though punishment is good for his misbehavior, you need to get to the root of it and correct the underlying problem.
I don’t know, does it seem to be effective? I work with elementary schoolers and some of them just don’t seem to care any which way, no matter what the consequence of their behavior is. The good news is, eventually they get tired of being in trouble all the time and getting bad marks in class that they decide to turn around themselves. I’ve witnessed it myself in the past few weeks, I think the trick is to get enough kids in the class to get down on them about disrupting the class. One of the boys in the fourth grade Power Hour class I co-teach, finally had enough other kids tell him he was keeping them from concentrating and from having his teacher disappointed with his lack of work that he decided for himself that he was going to stop and really work at his homework.
why does a 9 year old have a phone and tv? He sounds spoilt. They are not much of a punishment. He should be doing extra chores around the house, no friends over, no after school activities till his behaviour improves
Lenoardo DiCaprio, Ashton Kutcher, and Jim Carrey were all class clowns who had gotten into trouble multiple times.
One question though, why would your 9 year old have a phone?
Boys sometimes will be boys. I’m the only girl and I have two older brothers. They would bring their friends over (who were boys) and they would do the most random, idiotic things, and they – thought it was funny.
Explain to your child there is a time for fun and games and laughter, and there is a time for learning.
Your son might have a hidden talent or let him relent his energy elsewhere. Does he play sports? Involved into acting? Drama? Something other than television and xbox.
I was that kid. I was also grounded a lot. I think I got a little more tame after being punished, but at HS graduation, I received a class clown plaque.
The thing is– kids laugh. It’s hard to combat that. Good luck.
We went though this with my daughter. She just had to be the center of attention and the class clown was her way of doing that. We took away all of her “fun” things as you have done but it was only a short term fix, she would behave until she got them back and then it would all start over again.
We went to the school and had a meeting with her teacher and the principle and had her there with us. We all sat down and explained to her on her level that school was for learning and that play was for recess. We asked her why she was acting out and then listened as she talked. It helped, and between the 5 of us we came up with a plan to make it more positive for her and more pleasant for the teacher and class. Now when she starts to act up the teacher assigns her a task to do such as helping grade papers or passing out papers which will redirect the energy. At home we went to every day she makes it at school without a negative comment she earns a check on the memo board and once she has 10 checks then she can cash them in for a outing of her choice, a new dvd or other things we selected. When we do get the notes now about a bad day we simply tell her there is no check that day ask her what happened and then tell her it is more fun to get rewards than to not. When we made a huge deal out of it we were giving her what she wanted, to be center of attention again not only at school but at home as well.